Is there any Bruin Worse than Wideman?

Dennis Wideman has a small cult following within the Bruins fan base as consistently being the worse player to lace up for Boston. This following grows with every errant shot and every give away. The call for a trade is loud and at times violent. I watched highlights of today’s matinee game, where he actually loses the puck in his own zone, making an attempt to pull a rabbit out his helmet, and skates directly into the referee, never to recover, allowing for a Jonathon Cheechoo break away goal. Winning the lottery should be recalulated to a probability of one over the amount of times Wideman forgets who his teamtes are and/or what the Bruins jersey colors are. No one would ever win again. For the amount of times I go on about Wideman, including this one, and for the amount of insults I could rain down upon the Bruins organization for being blind to his misfortunes, I’m going to switch gears. I propose the question, who on the Bruins now, or within Peter Chiarelli’s term, the B’s GM from the 2006-07 season to now, is worse than Wideman?

Under Chiarelli’s watch the Bruins signed or traded for, Chara, Savard, Rask, Wheeler, Lucic, Krejci, Ryder, head coach Claude Julian and Dennis Wideman. The B’s unloaded Raycroft and Kessel, among others, but the most important name out of those “others” is a gentleman by the name of Hal Gill. I have had the privelage of watching both Wideman and Gill attempt to play defense for the Bruins, and here are the statistical comparisons and simple facts sorrounding observations a monkey preoccupied with jerking himself off, could make with ease. First, the stats: Hal Gill for the Bruins, in 626 games acquried 87 points, 588 penalty minutes with a +41 plus minus. Dennis Wideman for the Bruins, has played in 181 games acquiring 103 points, 151 penalty minutes with a +35 plus minus. To put this in terms of averages would be pointless considering Wideman has already surpassed Gill, or will soon surpass him, in every relevant offensive category. Penalty minutes for Gill are only this high because he was clumsy and often was tricked into playing physical due to his size. To put this in perspective, and throw out the obvious facts I talked about earlier, Hal Gill measures in as 6’7″, 250 lbs. He also measures in, quite accurately mind you, as a pussy. If someone were to try to calculate how big of a pussy he was while he was a Bruin, think a Giant sized Phil Kessel with an inability to score goals. Wideman’s main downfall revolves around his lack of patience and his inferior lead pass from the defensive end, often thought to be his greatest strength. He is however, a fast skater, with a smart slap shot and an offensive state of mind. Hall Gill had a good slap shot, good meaning average, was very slow and suprisingly weak, and had only a defensive state of mind, a “state mind you” that I probably could have taught those masturbating monkeys how to mimick. No talent at all? I won’t commit to that. Talent enough to play on a first line defense? Absolutely not, and the same opinion goes towards Wideman’s current situation on the B’s current depth chart. Wideman admitted this year, he has not played up to his ability, an ability he claims he showed last year. It is my strong opinion that he and the Bruins organization, an organization who traded for Wideman straight up for 40 goal scorer Brad Boyes, are hiding behind his nearly team leading, nearly league leading plus minus of last year. It is also my opinion that the Bruins hid behind Hal Gill’s size and reach, and this is the only thing keeping him in the NHL today.


So what reasons are worse? Who is/was more of a liability? What player cloaks his inabilites the best? Was Hal Gill a worse Bruin than Dennis Wideman remains today? Is there someone worse I haven’t even mentioned? The answer is no. For all of the reason’s Hal Gill seems worse than Wideman, there is in fact one thing I didn’t mention. Dennis Wideman believes, with all his heart, that he is a reincarnated version of Bobby Orr. What he fails to realize is, Bobby Orr is still alive, and you can not be reincarnated by a still living soul. That being said, he’s a show off and assumes he is a superstar amidst a Bruins lineup which houses no superstars (other than Chara and potentially Bergeron). He is the worse player I have ever watched play for the Bruins, taking into account organizational support and a false sense of stardom. At least Hal Gill knew he sucked.


2 Responses

  1. Hal Gill’s name is on Lord Stanley’s Cup.

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